ok...first update since the earthquake...

everything is perfectly fine (except this damn weather which is making  me feel sick) so i gotta leave for work in a little bit. 

going mai tai's tonight... all natro plays at 11.  if u need to find me there, i'll prob be in the front next to ziggy...there's no way anyone wouldnt notice him.  just look for the guy dancing up a storm...seriously.  then just look for the quiet shy girl next to him...cause thats me (ha ha  ha...me? shy? quiet? what a great joke, huh?)

k den...gotta get dressed.

/teeny

i finally had some credit apps...thank goodness!!!

today was good...woke up next to my hunny... (no...didnt sleep at his place...fell asleep in the car!!! ha ha ha)

well...not too much to say.  gotta go do laundry.

night all.

nothing seems to be happening now...talk about boring.

at home...all alone...no one to talk to...nothing to do...

boring.

yawn.

i want to go out...but nobody's free...dang it.

i havent gone drinking in soooooooo long.  need a drinking buddy (as in someone who will drink with me, but not let me get piss a$$ drunk) maybe in november...when im transitioning.

but anyway...im just waiting around for ziggy to call...that lolo-brain. 

k den...thats it for now...just had to share my boredom.

~teeny

ok...so here we are...on a day when most people dont work.  most people, except for me.  I WORK BOTH JOBS TODAY!!! may i say, lucky bastards who get today off.  all i know is work (job #1) is going to be busy.  crud. 

so i went to hoku's with jason last night... *sigh*  what a great dinner. (esp when someone else pays...j/k) he even bought me flowers...he was going to surprise me by leaving them in my room at gma's house, but i came home from work too early, so he just brought them to my door instead.  (all pastel colored flowers!!! and roses in there too!!!)  all i can say is wow.  i just got home about half an hour ago...wound up falling asleep in his arms. 

it feels so good to have someone who loves me for me.  someone who can look at me and make my heart melt.   and i just love the ability to fall asleep in his arms.  to totally trusting someone. 

oh, and i got to wear my pretty dress...(the one i bought during some "retail therapy" back in june)  i should put a pic up of that...i looked like sooooo hot. (nah...not really...the dress looked hot...i was just so-so) i feel so giddy right now its crazy.  last night was the night that i just didnt want to end.  why? because it was so wonderful. 

*sigh*

so im going to get ready for work, and hopefully not be too giddy. who am i kidding? im going to be giddy all day.  but i dont mind one bit.  tee hee hee. ok...time for this giddy person to go now.

~teeny

so dad went for a prostate biopsy last week monday...results came in yesterday.  he's got prostate cancer...agressive form.  so now he has two types of cancer to fight, lung and prostate.  im pretty sure everyone remembers my emotional breakdown last year when we found out about the lung cancer.  the doc gave him 2 months-2 years to live.  its been about 1 year and 3 1/2 months.  so im guessing this doesnt improve his chances too much.  i just dont know what to think.  this has been such a shitty year.  i thought that last year was the worst...i was wrong.  im scared and worried.  im glad that i have people in my life who care, people i can talk to.  im glad ziggy is in my life...acting as my shoulder to cry on.  all i know is i gotta be strong...for my mom and dad and the rest of the family.  so here goes putting on the brave face and smiling throughout it all...again.  not showing the world how scared i really am.  how much i want to just curl into a ball.  how much i want to run away from it all.  but i went through this before.  i just wish i didnt need to go through this again.  but the one sad and depressing thing is that this newest diagnosis doesnt change much...dad is still dying, it just affects how much longer he has with us.